BIG news and HUGE news!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First, the big news...
I'm designing a logo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I am using some fonts I don't have commercial licenses for, and designs I saw all over the internet and fashioning myself a brand spanky new LOGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It, of course is going to be FAB to the MAX and will be colorful and cutielicious!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm doing it myself in photoshop of course.

Then, the HUGE news....
*deep breathe*
I have a new enemy.  I have been HOARIBLY betrayed, and my fans need to know about it.  My EX-bffl Red (her real name is Ruby) is opening her own photography business.  She asked her husband for a Rebel for her birthday on the 27th and he got it for her, so now she's copying me. 

I just can't believe it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Her session fee is $5 and includes a disk of all images but she doesn't have Photoshop so she doesn't edit them so she sucks.  She doesn't know about Photobucket or Picknick's free editing and I'm TOTES not telling her!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I'm so glad I'm wearing waterproof mascera because I am SoOoOoOoOoOoO fustrated I could just cry.  She's even trying to out cute me with the name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Her business name is.......... are you ready for it???????

Bubbly Rainbows and Dimple Cheeks Photography

Hubseybunches just got home with a pint of B&Js and a romcom.  When I'm done sobbing I'll write more. 

Please leave me overly cutesy and outrageous compliments in the comments so I don't die of heartbrake.

 

 E/> Jane

 

Busy

Can't type now, on the phone with Kleinfeld ordering a replica of Kate's dress for husbymuffin and my ROV cerimony this summer.

So0o0o0o0o0o0o fit for a princess like me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't get it

There's this photographer in my town.  She charges like a bazillion dollars and has customers all the time.  I wanted to show her clients that they can get the same kinda piccies from me but cheaper so that way I'll have more and more clients.  So I went into her studio and pretended to be a client and checked out all her equipment and took iphone piccies of her pix she had on the wall.  She said they were canvases or something.  And I recognized the places where she went in her pictures, so I went to those places for my shoots the last few days and took pix in the exact same poses and posted them on her facebook wall by tagging her. 

Her clients are MEAN and DUMB!!!!!!!!!!!  

They said my people were blue?????  And the kids aren't smiling, and are blurry and OOF?  I have NO idea what OOF means, but my people are the color they are when I take the picture.  The camera is on Auto, which means it takes a picture of everything you see exactly how you see it with your eyeballs.  SORRY I don't photoshop my people so theyre skin is all perfect, but I don't know how and plus it would probably take FOREVER.  My people aren't blurry, its called soft focus, duh people.  It's ART.  Sorry you don't know nothing about ART!!!!!!!!  And what the heck does "your colors are nuclear" mean anyways????????  I'm pretty sure nuclear is like the new way to say rad or something, right?  So that's good that my colors are nuclear and awesome, right?????????  I LoOoOoOoOvE bright colors, they make my eyes happy.

But anyways, I'm just going to find another photographer in my area that has nice clients and that way they'll all come to me and I can get 100 customers and save up for a Cannon 5d.  I still can't believe husbeylover made me resort to "saving" like we're in a third world county or something.  Little update on that, he's been sleeping in the guesthouse since "the incadent".  How dare he treat me like anything but a perfect princess!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways, since that photographer's clients were so mean, I defended myself on her facebook and told them all what meanies they were and told them I hope they get botched eye lifts and tummy tucks.  Oh yeah, I went there, that's how mad I was!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  But I think fighting publickly with people will show my clients how committed I am to my business.  So that's really good and stuff.

And for the last bit, which is HAPPY, and will turn your frownyfaces into smiling cutiefaces, I've been learning Photoshop C5 so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I'll have more tutorials up soon!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm thinking maybe a "Tutorial Tuesday" would be good since it sounds so adorbs, rite???????? 

{Huggymuffins!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!}

E> Jane

Can I borrow your piccies??????

I need to steal borrow some of your images to pass off as mine use as "placeholders" in some upcoming blog posts!!!!!!!!!!  I can't use my own beautiful images because then people will steal them because they're so gorgeous!!!!!!!!!!!!

A few little tidbits.........
1.  PLEASE be sure they're as adorbz as my images.  See my portfolio for examples of my talent.  I KNOW, I KNOW, you're thinking "but Jane, I'm not NEARLY as amazing as you!!!!!!!!!!!"  It's okay.  Just try to find piccies that come close.

2.  I won't be giving credit.  No watermarks please.  And I totally will be editing them with my mad skillz.  If you watermark them, how can I pretend their mine use them on my website without confuzing peeps?  Rite????????

3.  Send your images (jpeg only) to gigglesandcutiepumpkins {at} gmail {dot} com  and include a note if you wanna!!!!!!! The more you flatten me and inflate my ego, the more likely I'll use your piccie!!!!!!!!!!! *giggles*

ummmmmmm I think thats like totally everything?

{LOOOOOOOOOOVE}

Somebody told me

Somebody told me that a Cannon Rebel isn't a good camera for a pro.  And I looked all over at these different photography forums and they said it to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I figured it out!!!!!!!!!!!!  THIS is why I can't get the blurry stuff in the backround of my piccies!!!!!!!!!!!  My camera isn't the best one!!!!!!!!!!!!!  So I was thinking about Nikon and Cannon and which ones the best and I realized that I want a Cannon because it sounds big and scary and like what is a Nikon anyways it's like not even a word??????  So I want a Cannon something or other.  But want to know something exteremely horrifying???????  I think you'll need to sit down for this because this is like worse than world hunger, crying puppies and terrorism COMBINED.

Hubberloveykins gave me a PRICE LIMIT!!!!!!

 Can you BELIEVE that?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!  I haven't stopped crying since like the moment he said it.  I gave him LOTSA snuggles and he still has the nerve to do this too me??????????  I just like don't know what I did wrong!!!!!!!!!!!  I think he may be getting divorced on me or something!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

So like now I don't know what I'm going to do.  How am I supposto get the best pictures without a big, expensive camera that will do it for me?????????????

I am just. 

going. 

to die.

Happy Easter!!

I 35 mini-seshes yesterday and now I have 14 baby cutie real life bunnies and I dunno what to do with em.

Any ideas??????????

Another Tutorial-- Sepia

Hi guys!!!!!!!  I think it's like a super lucky day because everyone keeps saying there having a good friday and you know what?  I for sure agree!  It IS a good friday!!!!!!!!!!  I just figured out how to do sepia (pronounced suh-PEE-ah for those who aren't awesome pros like me) and I hafta say, sepia is like one of the like PRO-est things you can do to your pix.  It turns them brown instead of black and white, so they look all old fashioney.

Flipping.  

Rad.

There is nothing other than turd colored pictures of your baby that screams "talent" and "class".  NOTHING.

So hears how you do it!!!!!!!  This is for Photoshop C5.  It's kinda hard so try to keep up.

1.  Open your pic

2.  Go under the Image thingy up top on the toolbardoodle

3.  Go down to adjustments and click it

4.  Click on the choosey menu thing and go down to sepia and click it

5.  Make sure the density slideydoohickey is at 100%

6.  Make sure "perserve luminoty" is NOT clicked.  If it is, your pic will be really bright and not old looking.

TA-DA!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's a pic of my Son, Breklyn with his gorge smile!

BEFORE-  Colors.  Lame.

AFTER- Sepoopia!!!!!!!!!!! AWESOMSAUCE!!!!!!!!!

It for realsies brings out his eyes.  FRAMING IT!!!!!!!!!!  Okay I lied, I'll be adding a super dense black vinyet then I'll be framing it!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love and Pumpkins!!!!!!!! 

E>  Jane

What happened today

Today I went to the park, it has lots and lots of flowers, and I like shooting there, so I brought my client who had a totes adorbs cutiepumpkin baby girl, and we started taking piccies but then this other lady comes up with her camera and takes piccies and I coughed loudly which DUH means GET OUTTA HERE and she just looked at me like I was getting on her nerves, but I was TOTALLY there FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I don't know why other pros (not pros like me, but MEANIE ones) think they can just come and steal my spot to take piccies!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I mean I have my pix up all over the internets, and that OBVI means thats MY spot.  If this other chick comes and starts taking pix there, then everyone that sees her sight is going to think she's ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  She is TOTES trying to rip off my style you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And that's not even the worst of it you guys, are you ready for this?????????? 

Her kid

was wearing

a pink

TUTU

!!!!!!!!!!!!

I mean SIRIOUSLY???????????  I almost aksed her if her name was Jane too.  Could she try harder to be me?????????  So if you see anyone else with pix of a kid in a pink tutu, with flowers in the background, you should tell them to stop trying to rip me off, expecially when they're charging so much money.

Also, I gave my hubbermuffin some extra snuggles last night and he said I can TOTES get another lense!!!!!!!!!!  Which one should I get????????  What's the name of the lense that gives you the blurry background??????????  I know someone said I could use goosein blur on Photoshop, but I can't find it anywhere and since I'm richer than you I can just buy the super expensive lense that does it for me because DUH, stuff that does stuff for you automatically = the bomb.

E>  Remember, Jane loves you because your all ROCKSTARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

p.s. speaking of rockstars I herd Lady Gagas Judas song and I just dont get it.  She's in love with the guy that stabbed Jesus in the tummy?  That's not very nice.  Besides, wouldn't that mean the guy is like 3,000 years old????????  GRODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Photoshop

Now that my download FINALLY finished, I have Photoshop C5 or whatever, and I've downloaded some super cute actions so I can learn them and repackage them as my own.  It's taking SoOoOoOoOoO LONG to learn this stuff, you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  How in the heck am I supposed to balance this and my 34 shoots I have this month???????????? 

I am making some tutorials for you guys though, so I hope your EXITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Here's the tutorial list I have so far, leave me a cutie comment if there's more you want me to teech, I LoVe teeching so I am willing to give you everything I know and stuff.

1.  Selective coloring (CHECK!!!!!!!!)
2.  Make the eyes POP with alienlike brightness
3.  Adding a texture to mask the oopsies in the piccie
4.  Prop ideas we never get tired of seeing
5.  Turning a blurry piccie into a "soft focus" image
6.  Oversharpening to save motion blur/ out of focusness
7.  ALL THINGS SEPIA!!!!!!!!!!!!
8.  Heavy vignetting
9.  Text on your photos

What else, my lovies?!?!?!?!?!?

Me Me Me Me and Me

Okay so like, I have been having this issue, and I just know the blog is the best place to talk about it.  It's personal, but I know the key to every good business blog is to put way personal, completely irrelevant information on here so my clients can get to know stuff about me that they wish they never knew.  So here goes..............

My kids have been doing these things and it makes me feel this certain way.  And also, my friend........... you know my friend is visiting, so it's making me feel all these other ways, and do these crazy things, and eat lots of sweets (but sometimes salty snacks too) and fight with my husband.  Also, I totes had a fight with my bestie over this completely unflattering issue that is unbecoming to any business person, but I wanted to share it with you anyways, and give you all kinds of gory, disgusting details.  It's SuUuUuUuUuUpEr hard having a business AND a personal life, so I'm going to let them bleed together.  Oh and, this is my REALLY controversial political opinion that I MUST share on my business blog.  It's pretty ignorant, but I feel SUPER passionate about it because all of my smartysmart friends talk about it lots, so I wanted to share it with you on here.

I'm so glad you guys, my lovingest fans, get to hear all this stuff about me!!!!!!!!!!! I know you'll keep loving me irregardless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

E> J

Thought of the day

Is there like an app that rates ugliness on a scale of 1-10 in potential clients??????????  

If your ugliness is 3-10, my number is 1-985-655-2500

EEW.

So Irritated!!!!!!!!

First, guys, I'm SoOoOoOoOo sorry I made you go more than 24 hours without me.  I know you were panicking and I'm just so sorry!!!!!!  Please say you'll forgive me????

Second, I seriously can't believe what happened today.  I went out with my bestie and I saw this nother photographer, and she was selling a session for.......... get this............ $150!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  FOR JUST THE SITTING FEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I was like WHA?!?!?!?!?!  Can you spell rippoff!?!?!?!?!?!  And her disk was............ are you sitting down............ $1500.00!!!!!!!!!!!!!  LOOK AT ALL THOSE ZEROS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   I asked her, I said "why do you rip peeps off????? It's totally bad karma, duh!!!!!!!!!" and she looked at me like I was a total nutterbutter!!!!!!!!!!  I mean okay, lets look at it like this, kay?  They get their super rich husbands to buy them a $3,000 camera just by looking hot and giving them extra snuggles and love.  One more snuggle sesh and there's you're Mack Book Pro.  It's not like they have to pay for it or anything!!!!!!!!!!!  And then they get clients without having to pay for any advertizing at all (see my last, totally bombalicious post for ways to do this)  and they go out and take less cuter than mine piccies, upload them to their compie and put them on a disk.  THATS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!  It's not like they have to pay taxes if they were only as smart as me and just did it "under the table".  (Isn't that phrase totes adorbs btw????? like I'd actually touch the nasty underside of the table EL OH EL!!!!!!)  And it's not like they have to buy expensive software, HELLO, HAVE YOU NOT HEARD OF PIRITING?!?!?!?!!?!?!  Photoshop = FREE.  And seriously, who edits the heck out of their piccies anyways?????????  All of the good edits I do (check out the PORTFOLIO, PEEPS!!!!!!!) take me 15 seconds.  Why should anyone pay them like it takes 5 hours?????????  All this "skill" garbage is such a load!!!!!!!  Peep my mad skills, and I didn't study, or take classes that I paid for, I'm just a natural.  Which is why my prices are SO flipping awesome, rite???????????? 

Some people. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO rong.

Also, check it, I'm gonna start doing WEDDINGS SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My price for all day coverage will be $150, but that's only cuz I guarantee 2,000 piccies and will be there for 8 hours.  Otherwise I TOTES wouldn't charge so much.  I am NOT a ripper offer!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love and Cutie Pumpkins!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! E>  Jane

P.S.  I totes love punctuation marks almost as much as I love looking at myself in the mirror.

Advertizing Ideas

I am going to start advertizing soon and I need some ideas.  Here's the ones I have already..........

1.  I'm going to Facey friend all these other photogs that have lots of friends and post a link to my site on their wall.  But I'll pretend like I'm leaving a reg comment so they'll totes not notice I'm trying to steel there fans.  Something like "OHEMGEE your piccies are uber adorbs!!!!!!  Come check out my photography, it's a little cuter and way cheaper!!!!!!  <post link>"   Classy, right?

2.  Tag all of my friends and all the photographers I know in every single piccie I post.  Max exposure!!!!!!

3.  Follow tons of blogs and twitters unrelated to photography and post my link in every comment I leave!!!!!

4.  Send out postcards to everyone in my town.  I have a design in mind already (yeah, my art skills are that bombtastic!!!!)  it includes no piccies and no basic information about what I do.  I want it to be like this commercial from the 80s guy that took over PlanEx.

5.  Buy a Facey Ad and use my ToTeS aDoRbS slang and random capitalization to grab the attention of equally hip mommies!!!!!!

I TOTES forgot #6, it really was on my list, swear to Kim Cattrall!!!

6.  CRAIGSLIST AD!!!!!!!!  IN ALL CAPS, SO PEEPS CAN IMAGINE ME SCREAMING ABOUT MY AWESOME TALENT AND FEROSH DEALS!!!!!!!!  I DONT THINK I'LL USE A PICCIE, BUT IF I DO, IT WILL BE THE WORST OUTTAKE OF MY VERY FIRST SHOOT EVER!!!!!!

What do you think??????????????????????????????

Gimme more ideas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My first tutorial!!!!!!

Holy wowzers you guys, I am SoOoOoOoOo flattened by all of your sweetness!!!!!!  You have been practicly BEGGING for me to teach you my bomb skills, so here's my first tutorial!!!!!!!

How to do my FAVE editing technique:  Selective color.  With super cute instructions!!!!

Step 1, Honeybun:  go to photobucket and upload your piccie

Step 2, cutiepoo: click Edit

Step 3, chickadee: click Color Splash

Step 4, totes adorbs: color in the thing you want in color.

A few tips:  

E>  The more dead looking the skin is the better.  NEVER color in something relevant to the pic itself. 
E>  Color in things like loud shirts, an unimportant background element and or there shoes. 
E>  It's TOTES hard to get the edges perfect, so I always color a little bit outside the edges to make sure I got it all.
E>  When selective coloring the eyes, I ALWAYS add a layer of color that's completely RIDIC and would never ever be a realistic eye color.  It really makes the imige POP!

OKEYDOKEYARTICHOKEY, wowzers that teaching stuff REALLY makes you feel good inside!!!!  I feel like I just cured AIDS or something.  My heart is so puffylove and overflowing!!!!!!!  I hope the rainbow didn't offend anyone.  I love the gays, they are like TOTES the most fashion forward, so I love to support them by putting cutieppumpkin rainbows up places.

I had a few fan males I wanted to address:

Anonymous said:

You should totally print at home! There is nothing I love more than seeing a faded print hanging on my wall 6 months after I've printed it. It makes it feel very old fashioned and like my family has been established for a very, very long time. 

A, you are TOTES right!!!!!!!  I can't tell you how much I LoOoOoOoOoVe vintage!!!!!!  I think I'm gonna offer this as a option to my clients.  But only the super adorbs ones that will rock the vintage look.  If you can't handle the style I won't offer it.   Another part of my quality servise!!!!!!

Anonymous also said:

....wow....are you 12? Really your Spelling, photos and the way you even present your self is HORRABLE! Get a real job and Leave the Photos to a REAL photographer. 

Anonymous, I don't get you.  You help me, then you insult me????  Whats up, buttercup?????  As much as I love misspelled accusations of misspelling AND randomly capitalized letters, I just don't understand where we went wrong????  I was gonna invite you to my mani-pedi-margi-party for being my biggest fan and leaving me the most comments. *frownyface*  Ok, here's Dr. Cutieumpkins perscripshin:  go take a handful of bi-polar meds and drink three cosmos, watch SATC the movie and give me a call, kay?  We can still be e-besties.  Oh and also, I already said I'm 26 yesterday AND in my about me.  I'm not 12.  It is NOT 1997 right now because that was just NOT a good year for fashion for me.  Straight bob gone all wrong, hairdo DISASTER.  Bad mems.

Thanks for all youre nice comments everyone!!!!!  And be sure to check out my NEW about ME section AND my Facey!!!!

Love and Cutie Pumpkins,

Jane

Printing

I'm in a bit of a dill lemon here today.  *frownyface*
You guys, my loving fans, are pros like me so maybe you can help me.

Okay, so I did those four shoots the other day.  Well, like 3 and a half because of that little bratface but still.  Now that I've gotten them all selective colored and oversaturated and they look like dead kids with neon tutus and giganto hair bows on......... One of the moms actually wants ME to print the pix!  Ugh, pain, I know, rite?!  So....... I'm thinking Walgreens?  There good, right?  Someone told me Costco is professional quality, but there like 19 cents per print and walgreens is like 10 cents.  And they only paid me $10 and I already spent it on seeing Eclipse again at the discount theater!!!!  (Be tee doubleyou... Team Jacob all the way)

You guysssss this biz stuff is HARD!!!!!!!  I'm TOTES gonna need a mani-pedi-margi-party after this!!!!!!

Okay you know what, I know what your gonna say: "Your a PRO now Jane.  Put on your big girl g-string (the Vicki Secrets kind, not the sleazy kind) and give them PRO quality."

So Costco it is.

Lucky for me, instead of working hard, we're loaded so I can get whatever I want and not have to worry about cost of goods sold or profit margin or any of that bo-RING junk.  I bet it's hard having to budget in stuff like that, right?  I can't even IMAJIN how hard it is.  That's probably why all those old businessmen guys all have like wrinkles and frownyfaces all the time.  Lucky for me times two, I love BOTOX!!!!!! LOVE LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!

So now that I've solved my own problem (see what I mean about me being the straight bomb?) I have a few important things I did for you guys, my loving fans.

1.  I started a FACEY!!!!!!! It's www.facebook.com/giggesandcutiepumpkins like duh, but there's also a linkeypoo now on the left under my absolutely PRESH about me.  And for you H8ers, there's a bownafied picture of me up there on the facey!  Edited with a taste of my new blingee skillz, which I know you'll all be copying like tomorrow.  But oh well, such is life when your a uberpopular professional like me.  I'll be sure to link you on the facey if I have a new blog post since I know your all doing the facey like it's a drug.  I know it's MY drug.  But so is your love!!!!!!!! Is my love your drug?  el oh el!  (Ke$ha is another idol... LOVES HER!!!!!! TOTES ADORBS with all that GLITTER!!!!!!!!!)

2.  Classes!!!!!!  Or Mentoring!!!!!!!  Since I'm totally not a rip off photographer, I'll be doing classes and mentoring for free through my blog whenever I can figure out all these buttons.  But for now, I'll answer any questions I get in the comments.  So ask away my sweeties!!!!  Maybe when I figure out all these buttons I'll make like a question box or something. 

I hafta add a little side note here... Seriously, if you're only here to try to steal my poses and locations, step off because your skills wont match mine.  EVER.  Nor will your cuteness.  EVER EVER.  Also, I won't be answering any meanie questions or comments that use too many naughty words.  Didn't your mother ever tell you not to talk like that?  I mean EEW for reals.  SoOoOoOoOoO unprofessional.

3.  A little more about ME!!!!  People keep asking "hold OLD are you!?!?!"  Which is like totes rude, but whatevs, I'm taking it as a compliant because they probaly think I'm so young because my lingo is so HIP!!!!  I'm 26.  My bee-day is 1/1/85, that's right, NEW YEARS BABY!!!!!!!!!!  If you're wondering why 1985 was such a rockin year, it's because I was born first and MADE it that way!!!!!!!!
Well technickley I was born second, but TBH the first baby of the year was wrinkly and suffered from a major case of the uggo, so we don't count him.  And now for a suprise present...................
I'm gonna make a hole about me PAGE!!!!!!!!!! so you can learn all your Jane Momtographer FACTS and be my biggest fans (as if you aren't alredy).  Aren't you just SO GREATFUL for my generocity?!?!?!?!

So there you go!!!! My gifts to you:  MORE ME!!!!!!!  Don't you just LOVE IT!!!!!!??????

Mrs. Popularity!

Holy Moly, I didn't realize I would be so popular so fast!  I mean I totally know that the undeniable cuteness I exood is so infecting, more than H1N1 but still!  Ok, so first let me address my loving fans questions.  In super cute color, of course!!!!

1.  I'm totally real.  Im not from that place the lottery scammers come from (and I wont even type the name of the place because it's so racist, I just HATE the n-word!!!!!)  I'm as real as my idol Heidi Montag.  LOVE HER!!!!!  She's like a grown up Barbie!!!!  Oh, and this is the only sight I have, I'm not part of any others, and if I was it would be www.itotallysoamaphotographer.com not www.youarenotaphotographer.com I am not that mean.  People who hold meanness in their heart end up with really bad acne anyways, I heard that from Dr. Phil.

2.  Some of you totes want to see my pix and my sight, DON'T WORRY!!  One of my rad fans suggested wix.com and I'm so THERE!!!!  I'm desining my sight as we speak.  I've got some placeholder pix I right clicked and saved from other photographers sights.  I'm prettymuch as good as they are, so these are totes accurite.  DOOOONT WORRRRRY!!!!!!  I had my friend who is a photoshop ROCKSTAR take off theyre logo from the picture so nobody will think I'm them.  El oh el, I totally would NEVER try to confuse people like that!!  But if the real photogs get mad, or if anyone asks, my web designer did it. 

3.  My camera and my lense "line up".  Um, first, my lenses didn't commit a crime, so I would NEVER call it a "line up".  Tacky much?  There my RaD gEaR!!!!!!  I have my Rebel (though I wish they called it a Diva instead of a Rebel because it TOTES describes me better!!!!) and I have a big lense.  Its the one that came with the camera, so I know it's really pro!!!!  It says EF-S on it.  I'm going to save up and hopefully I'll get some more bigger ones soon.  I want one that makes the stuff behind the babies blurry. I don't want the lense too big though, I don't want boy arms like Madonna.  EEW!

4.  Where am I???  Hello, I'm everywhere!!!!  I'm really like H1N1 but 100x more adorbz.  And instead of making you sick, I make you beautiful pictures of cutie pumpkin kiddies!!!  I have an email address (of course, I AM legit you know) it's gigglesandcutiepumpkins at gmail dot com.  I just can't figure out how to put it on the blog b/c there are WAYYY too many buttons here.  HTLM, what the heck-o is THAT anyways?!?!  This blog needs an AUTO button as rockin as my cameras so it will do everything for me!!!!!!!  But please don't send me anything mean, we all know that people ONLY say mean stuff about ur photography when there jealous anyways.  Like that guy that called me a looser.  And I'm sure that super long comment had meanie stuff in there too, but lets be honest here, TL;DR, right????? Um, jealous much you guys?  Don't worry though, cuz if you follow me, you might learn how to be ALMOST as cute as me.  With alot of stress on the ALMOST, of course. 

and last but not leased...

5.  Taxes and all that other stuff I didn't understand.  I don't need all that stuff because I don't have a studio store and I don't charge enough that the IRS will even notice.  They only care about the photographers that charge an arm and a leg.  Besides, my hubby and I pay our regular taxes so the IRS wont care about my side biz.  This is AMERICA, not communist RUSHIA!!!  Ugh, debbie downers, all so jealous of my rad ideas that they have to try to RUIN them.  Whatevs.

LoOoOoOoOoOvE you guys!!!!!!!!!!  Your almost as cute as I look with my new damask camera strap and matching Louboutins!

-Jane

P.S. Whoever said "totes adorbs" was the most annoying phrase ever is BAND from this page.  Obvi there satan worshipers or something.

P.P.S All you guys that said about weddings gave me a totally RIDIC idea!!!!!!!  Brainstorming sesh tonight!!!!!!! 


***I TOTES put up the wrong email addy on accident!  FIXEDIT!!!!!!!!****

OHEMGEE!

Welcome to my new blog!  I just bought a Canon Rebel last week with the money I saved up from my birthday in January, and today... *~*drumrolllll*~* I'VE DECIDED TO START UP MY PHOTOGRAPHY BUSINESS!!!!!!!

I know, SUPER exciting, right???!!!!  I've dicided to name it "Giggles and Cutie Pumpkins Photography" because, well, I'm only gonna shoot cute kiddies (hello, who wants uggos in the portfolio?!) and giggles are the cutie ootiest!!  I've made a free blog through blogger and got a free email addy from gmail, so now I'm totally legit.  I made my blog all pink because I'm am totally girly and just LoVe pink!  I figur the best way to reach an audience is completely pigeon holing myself into a niche so tiny I'll never get clients.  It's okay though, because my camera takes TOTES awesome pix.  Okay I know you're wondering how much I'm gonna cost, so here's the OFFICIAL price list.

Session fee $10 if you want to go outside, or $15 if you want to use my wrinkled bed sheet as your background.  I don't know how to photoshop yet, so I hope you like wrinkles!!

8x10 is $3 and 5x7 is $2.50.  But there won't be any need to buy these since I'll give you the disk for free!!  YEAH, that's what seperates me from those RIP OFF photographers.  I'll give you everything for free and not charge you like five hundred dollars for the disk.  I mean I just load the pix from the camera onto my computer, then from the computer onto the disk, WHY would I charge you for that?  el oh el, it's not like I'm trying to make a decent living here or anything!!!

So N-E-WAY, hit me up if you want a photo shoot!  Don't worry, I've made my email addy so unbarably long you'll never remember it!!  I'm totally looking for ADORBS babies to shoot.  OHEMGEE doesn't that sound totally funny?  Like I want to shoot them with a gun or something?!  No, it's just photography lingo don't worry.  I mean I want to shoot them with my camera.  You'd know if you were a pro like me.

LOVE AND CUTIE PUMPKINS!!!!

-Jane